So I'll talk about my plans first because my life update will be a lot more boring and long but my plans are rather exciting. For me at least ^^
So, first of all I already got my haircut and I am really happy with it c: It's more layered and nicer fringe now, so that's already ticked off my to do list.
Secondly, on thursday
I also plan to (If I can convince my mother) purchase some frozen feeder rats and practise skinning them and getting at their skulls and things. The reason I need to convince her of this is because I'm going to need to buy and be in the possession of a sharp thing and my mum is relucant to do that for fear I will slip into sort of old not really fairly recent habbits. I'm hoping though that I will be able to do this. I think that's it for plans for my summer other than a few other little bits and bobs that I will probably write about after doing them xD
Okay now the boring part. Life updates!
Well My GCSE's are over. Monday was my last exam. I came home had my hair cut and then went to my friends house. It was real good fun, all my friends went but it got to about 2 in the morning, maybe 3 and a few of us had drunk too much. Mostly me and my boyfriend. He threw up first, I was already feeling sick and then I was worried for him so I felt worse then I was sick and I ended up calling my dad to pick me up and went home. My boyfriend stayed and he was okayish for the rest of the night.
Anyway my parents were far from angry. I'm guessing they went through the same sort of experience when they were my age because they were laid back about it. I do have understanding wonderful parents so yeah, there was no problems there. In the morning my mum also told me she forgot to mention I shouldn't drink when taking my anti-depressants so I'm guessing that was also a contributing factor.
Possible trigger warning coming up guys D:
I'm doing pretty well at the moment mentally and stuff. I'm eating properlyish, not feeling so down so it's going pretty good. I had a little slip up the other day which I do regret. It was kinda deep but it's healed nicely but it was just one cut so I did manage to control myself slightly and I am rather proud of myself for doing so. I am still tempted but I'm resisting. The good news is it's sort of getting easier to resist and just ignore the temptations so I'm hoping this is a good sign of recovery!
On the whole I'm pretty happy at the moment with life. My friends are wonderful as always, my boyfriend is wonderful too and I deffinately, now my exams are over, feel like a stress has been lifted.
Regarding my Grandad's death, although it's still very fresh, I am at terms with it. I still love him so much but I know that he's still around. The other day my Uncle was trying to watch Deal or no deal on the tv. My Grandad despised that programme (I can't blame him) and while my uncle was trying to watch it, the channel kept changing on its own, over to some old 60's film. My uncle kept trying to change it back but it would just keep switching. To test, I changed the channel to songs of praise which he hated more than gameshows. After three seconds it turned over.
My grandma also said it turned on by itself in the morning. I don't know if it's the spirit of my Grandad, but it deffinately has his sense of humor, still winding my uncle up even after death. It's a comfort to think he's still in that house, still around living (kinda) in the routine he used to. I still miss him, but I feel like he's pretty happy wherever he is whether it's up in some afterlife or still in his house winding his kids up.
My grandma said when her dad died the same thing happened to her mum. She was just trying to watch tv and it changed to the golf three times every time she tried to change back. My great grandad LOVED golf, there just is no way to describe how much he loved it. After the 5th time of the channel changing to golf my great grandma told him that he could "Watch the bloody golf" if he wanted, and stormed off to another room, leaving him to watch the golf xD
I would say I most deffinately believe he is still around, watching out for us and I know he'll still be here. It's nice to know that he's still around :3 It makes me feel a lot better. In a way, I hope he came to the funeral, because he would've liked it. It was very uplifting. It had to be no one could say anything bad about him. Most tears that were cried were happy tears. I nearly started laughing half way through. My family are in no way religious but for some reason everyone had to sing a hymn? Well Mary, who was sort of conducting the funeral, lovely woman as she was, was really going for it. Her voice was so high and opera like and I just imagined my grandad chuckling away at this woman and I nearly laughed myself.
I do miss him an awful lot, I really do but he's not gone. Not really and I know it :3
Gosh, thanks if you read this far xD I don't know if anyone did. I probably wouldn't xDD But thanks if you did
Bye for now guys! Have a fantastic summer and I'm sure you will hear from me again pretty soon as I'm nearly always complaining about my life on here or typing out of excitment or just general updates and personal things xD
Dis zombie is out~



Truly appreciate the support !